We made it to five years.  Currently, that doesn't seem like a very big deal, but in the beginning, five years seemed very substantial.  In these past five years, a lot has changed.  I mean a lot.  Even though we thought we were already grown up, there has been a lot of growing up together in the last five years.  We moved across country a couple of times, we had a baby, and we both joined the Army (after changing careers a couple of times).  This is just to name a few of the changes.  

     Marriage at five years isn't as easy as it was in our first year.  In our first year, everything was so new.  Everything was fun!  We got a lot of attention for being newly weds.  People loved to give us their tips to successful marriages.  Currently, I can't even recall some of those tips, but it was still fun sharing in their joy.  Everything was romanticized.  There was a sort of glow to everything.  We loved it.  We lived for it.
 
                                                                                  ...........

    I'm coming back to this post several months later to finish it.  I can't even believe how much our marriage has changed in the last ten months.  We love, we laugh, we smile, we cry, it's emotional.  We are two humans, in two different bodies who perceive, feel and experience two different worlds as they coexist into one that is our family unit.
     Sometimes, getting along with another person is hard.  It often makes me think of when you are kids and your parents leave you to work through a disagreement until you get along.  You would think as an adult you knew how to always get along with another adult.  We have to always be figuring out new and creative ways to work through arguments, as well as get to know this person with whom we are journeying through the world.
     Now we are almost at six years.  I haven't a clue how six years ever went by so quickly.  Marriage constantly molds you.  I think we spend a good amount of time putting dents in each other.  We challenge each other, we butt heads, and, yes, we even hurt each other.
    I have found that one thing about allowing yourself to be most vulnerable to another person is that you allow yourselves to both love and hurt each other more than anyone else on this earth knows how.  So then you also have to learn to heal through the marriage aches.  I don't recall anyone ever mentioning this.  In fact, I have never heard of anyone including healthy healing into a healthy marriage.  No one ever told me that someone who loved me so much could also hurt me so much.  Now, I mean we don't abuse each other.  We definitely hurt each other's feelings.  When you have given someone your heart, you give up part possession of it.  You give up control.  When two hearts are on the line, with two human souls in charge, we sometimes make mistakes.  We don't always say the right words.  We don't always do the right things.  We get angry.  We laugh at both good and bad times.  Marriage sounds great right now, doesn't it.
    Through both the good and the bad you have part possession of your heart and part possession of your partners.  Therefore, it is of the utmost importance to remember that in some sense you are a guardian to their heart.
   

Accepting Marriage as an Act of Obediance

    I have read a lot of literature, Christian and secular, on men and women learning to live, love and dwell together.  I found them to be very useful when my husband and I were pursuing "courtship" and marriage.  I suppose they were most helpful in the conversation fodder that they offered.  They covered an extensive array of topics, but I don't recall much emphasis on marrying out of obedience.  I guess that takes a little of the romance away.
    This is something I've been thinking about, recently, as I am eagerly awaiting my husband's homecoming.  I have been spending a lot of time reflecting on the different stages of our relationship.  I guess this is because, in some ways, I am expecting to relive these stages.  As I think back to how we first met, fell in love, and then decided to marry, I recall the place God held in our journey.
     I said "decided to marry," but it didn't feel so much like a choice.  Instead, it was a response to what God was doing in the lives of Daniel and me.  I mean, we wanted marriage.  We really wanted to share our lives together and declare our vows before our family and friends, but I remember having this feeling.  It was like something bigger than us was directing our lives.  As cliché as this sounds, it really felt like we were acting out a movie.  In fact, when the topic of marriage first came up, Daniel was making an observation of how our relationship was growing into something and began the discussion of what to do if this "thing" kept going.  Before that, I remember having this other feeling when I was near Daniel.  It often felt like a voice (which, in my heart, I feel like it was God's voice directing this movie) telling me this is your husband.  It was like God had brought us together.

....Post stopped here...sorry it might seem incomplete.